And Then The Light Bulb Went On!

Well good morning all! The Bassets got me up early AGAIN and I can't get back to sleep, so of course to my blog I go. The coffee is brewing and the gum chewing has begun (yes, I still chew the sugarless gum that got me through the long stretch of Optifasting). I realize I haven't posted in awhile and that's due to a very hectic work period right now. Things don't ease up until Thanksgiving, when hubby and I wing our way down to Florida to spend the holiday with my Mom. Obviously, I can't wait!

A very, very dear Facebook friend sent me this picture earlier this week. I just smiled so broadly when I saw it, and at the same time felt tears in my eyes. How many days, how many years have I wasted raking myself over the coals for not being perfect? Not doing the "right thing" or being the "good girl" or never making mistakes? I'll just say that a damn good amount of time has been lost to worry and anxiety that I don't measure up to someone else's standards. And guess what? Today I'm pretty darn mad about this! (wink, wink)

I want to state for the record today that Melissa has done one hell of a good job maintaining the weight lost through the Optifast program. I've worked extremely hard to master, as best I can at this juncture, all the things that are required for a complete lifestyle overhaul. What I am doing is not easy. It's extremely difficult, actually. And I'm coming at this from every angle, to the best of my ability, and that's something to commend and celebrate.

In my case, it was just impossible to hold right at my goal weight of 160 lbs. Despite everything I was doing, all the restrictions in place, exercising as best I could in the face of great resentment, I could not hold goal weight. What I can hold, with a current regime that I am happy and content with, is a weight range of 168 - 172 lbs. And some days, particularly early in the week, I go up a little from that, but it inevitably comes back down. And all of this is AOK. This is my body saying, "Hey Melissa -- I'm happy here."

Now of course, in the back of my mind is the wonderful memory of hitting my 160 lb. goal  -- and actually, that one morning I got on my scale and it registered 155 lbs. That was a high like no other. But I'm not there now, and I'm not going back there, and frankly, today, that's fine by me. I'm 47 years old, 5' 6, curvy and wearing a clothing size that is the average for American women: 12-14. I was starting to creep into size 26 before the Optifast program. Yes, I've come a long way baby.

I am sitting here right now actually getting quite angry at those purported "medical experts" debunking liquid diets, citing all the failure statistics, implying if you're not in that 2-5% who keeps everything off, well that just proves their case. Well, Mr. Expert, some of us packed a little extra back on but we're doing pretty damn well. Healthy as a horse. According to you, we're with the 98% who failed. And I'm no failure. I'm a success story. Folks, remember this advice: Figures lie. And liars figure.

The sun is coming up and it looks to be a beautiful, chilly day in Columbus. I'm going to have my oatmeal, then slip back into bed for a little snoozing. I've spent this morning "approving of myself." And what do you know. I feel great!