Relief!

Pleased to report that this week's weigh-in showed an almost 4 lb. loss. So if you look at all the craziness over the past three weeks, I have averaged a 2.2 lb. loss rate per week. And this is what, historically, I have always logged. So I'm breathing a big sigh of relief tonight! As you know, that roller-coaster of big loss then big gain threw me for a quite a loop -- but I have good perspective now and I will be going on vacation with a big smile on my face.

I also had a chance to see a doctor from another one of the CONCI clinics who was filling in for our usual one. She is on vacation. We talked about my low sodium level and the prescribed addition of 1/8 tsp. salt in my daily soup and water restriction to 56 oz. per day. He said that plan was right on target. So it was like getting a second doctor's opinion, which was great!

Importantly, I spent time with the dietitian discussing my scale issues. Why I dislike them so. How I let them cause me emotional turmoil. She agreed with me that taking a "break" from the scale for a month by facing my back to it when I am weighed might not be such a bad idea. The staff would have no problem withholding the results from me for a month. I asked her if I was crazy, but she completely understood and made me feel comfortable. She didn't judge me or make light of my anxiety. Immediately, I felt tension release from my body. I'm so glad we had our talk.

So now I am starting to really focus on our departure in two days to Maine! I bought a two-week supply of products for the trip. I was at Walmart the other day and stumbled upon some Jello packs that don't require refrigeration so I'll be able to have my "treat" on my camping trip. Wonderful. And as you might recall, I'm a coffee junkie, and I have a fresh pound of Highlander Grog ground for a French Press ready to go. Mmmm...coffee at dawn at the campsite. Nothing like it.

Optifasting On The Road Again. Here we go!

So You Want To Try Optifast

Should I try it?

If you're like me, you've been unhappy about your weight for awhile. And you find yourself at that place where you know something must be done to bring your weight under control, hopefully for once and for all. From whatever source, you hear about the program called "Optifast." I knew about it because my brother did it two decades ago. I know in my case, I liked that word "fast." I wanted to lose my weight as quickly and as painlessly as possible. So I started doing a little research. And when I saw on Optifast's Facebook page that the average person loses 50 lbs. in 18-24 weeks, I was hooked.

Who wouldn't want to lose weight that quickly? It's an instant draw. A miracle. No other weight loss program, to the best of my knowledge, comes close to this projection. But is Optifast right for you? Well, that is a question only you can answer. What I can do is share with you some of the knowledge I have gained as I come closer to my five month mark. It may or may not be helpful in your decision-making process, but I'll just offer some of it up.

Before I decided to do Optifast, my husband had suggested I go to a generic nutritionist to help me lose weight. But I knew I needed a good, structured program with the food choices made for me. I needed food removed from the equation so I could focus on the behavioral issues that drive my overeating. Optifast provided that. Real food is removed. And in the United States, the clinics offer classes addressing both the behavioral issues and weight maintenance. So both of my needs were met.

The Optifast Team

I also learned from my research that Optifast, by removing food and significantly reducing your calorie intake, impacts your body in significant ways. More often than not, adjustments have to be made to maintain good health. This includes possibly adding potassium or sodium supplements to your diet; taking gall bladder medication to avoid sludge build-up; taking fiber every day to avoid constipation; decreasing existing medications, etc. Most of these potential areas of concern are identified by regular blood work. And this is where some sort of physician oversight is required. So remember that if you start on Optifast, you will need to see a physician regularly.

Cha-ching!

Very important to know is the cost of the program. There are the product costs and the doctor costs. This is not a cheap program. I will have invested thousands of dollars before I am through. Honestly, I didn't think this entirely through when I started, and don't advocate taking my approach. Go over your finances and see if this is something you can afford. Keep in mind that there is no firm date when you will reach your goal. The scale fluctuates. Cheats set you back, you have to get back into ketosis, and you'll be on the program longer.  Also, if you are on the Optifast "partial" plan, you will lose weight more slowly. I know that I'll be on the program longer than I initially thought. This could very well be the case for you too. So plan accordingly.

Lastly, I have found going on a primarily liquid diet has radically changed my lifestyle. This may not be the case for you, but I have had to make adjustments to how I spend my days and evenings. Now, my life revolved around food, so perhaps this is to be expected. But I have had to be innovative. You might encounter this, you might not. Just prepare yourself as best you can for possible lifestyle changes.

As I think of more "Lessons Learned" I'll post them. I'm here to help!

Different Countries, Different Programs

One confusing thing about the Optifast program is the products are sold in different countries -- and consumption guidelines may differ significantly. Even the product choices available vary. In Australia, for instance, Optifast offers shakes, soups, bars and desserts. In Canada, only shakes are available. In the U.S., people on the Optifast 70 plan are limited to shakes; people on the Optifast 800 plan or an Opti 70/800 combo plan can choose from shakes, soups and bars. Subsequently, this makes it impossible for individuals all around the world to follow the same program.

Some other things to consider: There are Optifast 70, 600, 700, 800 and 900 products. Not all countries carry them. These products differ according to calorie content. Under the Australian plan, I believe participants have three products a day and two cups of vegetables. I do not know what type of vegetables are allowed. In the U.S., full fasters could be limited to 5 products, 6 products, or perhaps 7 products a day. It varies, based on blood work and health issues.

There is also the Optifast "partial" plan, that allows participants to have one meal of "real" food a day. Our clinics in the U.S. provide sample menus to follow. They are very simple. Different clinics may have slightly different menus for the meals. Some clinics may allow individuals to step off the full fast and switch to the partial plan for a time. Clinics may also allow those on the full fast to have a "special occasion" meal, thus breaking the fast for a day. Again, this varies from clinic to clinic, and also depends upon the individual.

Now, one thing that I personally find very concerning is the Optifast products can be obtained through Internet sites like Ebay and Amazon. This opens the door for anyone in the world to buy the products and start the program without medical supervision. Of course, it's one thing if you are enrolled in an Optifast clinic and choose to get your products through Amazon because they are cheaper. But it is quite another matter if you just order the products and try to consume them without any knowledge of how they work and the consumption guidelines you must follow.

Of course this is just my opinion, and remember I am writing from the United States, and I go to a clinic in Columbus, Ohio. We have mandatory guidelines for weigh-ins and dietitian and doctor visits every week. We must also have blood draws every two weeks. There are strongly suggested menus to follow. My clinic puts great emphasis on long-term success, as taking the products is actually fairly easy when compared to a lifetime of maintenance behavior and eating style. The vast majority of people who lose weight on a liquid/very low calorie diet gain the weight right back in less than five years. They want to reverse this trend. And instruct us accordingly.

Also, as you know I have the thyroid problem and I feel as if I have to fight for every pound lost. I am doing the full fast, and strict compliance is very, very important to me, so I write from that perspective (if you haven't noticed already!). So I may sound "preachy" from time to time, although that is not my intention. I will say I feel an incredible sense of accomplishment from embracing a "product only" lifestyle, and honestly it hasn't been too hard. I am lucky perhaps. And do remember the clinic has given me a green light for dining out with my husband at some point this month, and that is in the back of my mind.

Absolutely, there are some things we do all share. Struggles with cravings and cheats come to mind! Side effects from the products, compliance issues, emotional obstacles, and the challenge of many other lifestyle changes one must make while on the Optifast program are similar. There are many things we have in common. Just remember when it comes to your program, there is no one set way to do this. Keep that in mind to avoid confusion.    

On The Road Again!

Seeing as we are a "fly by the seat of our pants" couple, my husband and I have recently decided to depart on a 10-day camping summer sojourn next week -- to Maine! It's roughly a 20-hour drive from Columbus, but we will be stopping at various points along the way. A whirlwind of phone calls for reservations has started and it will be a mad dash for supplies this week-end. Organized in advance, we are not. Typical!

I have decided this will be a full-fast vacation. I'm excited about it, actually, because I want to prove to myself that I can go on vacation, maintain my compliance, and actually have some fun! I will be purchasing two weeks of product to tide me over. This will include the bars -- I know, I know, they are a weakness for me. But we will be doing some challenging hiking and white water rafting, plus kayaking and I must have those bars to carry for extra energy. There's no way around it. Making a shake in a raft or on a mountain isn't going to work.

But I will be able to make my soup by the campfire, and sip a shake whilst cooking the bacon and eggs for my husband. And oh, that morning coffee. There is nothing like it when you are out in the wilderness. I also sleep so well. So does my husband. We will be in a "tent cabin" -- it's a canvas tent on a platform with a screen door, two beds with a foam pad and electricity inside. No need to bring our own tent, which takes up space in the car and calls for set-up and break-down. This will be so much easier.

I'm also looking forward to getting away from the weekly weigh-in for awhile. I need a break from it. My mind will be free of worry and I can get things in perspective. I am feeling so much better today than I have in days past. It's wonderful. This should be an exciting getaway. On the road again. Hooray!

Here Comes The Calvary!

Oh, I am blessed. Honestly, tears are brimming in my eyes as I think about all of my family members and fellow Optifasters who have taken time from their busy days to offer comfort and words of encouragement to me during this time of my emotional turmoil. I never knew just how powerful a good Optifast support system can be. I am a very lucky woman. Here's what I have taken from our conversations:

Reflecting back on the past two days, I think that swing from losing 7.7 lbs. to a gain of 5 lbs. was something that affected me very, very deeply on an emotional level. I was not prepared for this, and it caused me much pain at first. I could not see at the time that this is an excellent learning experience for me -- so in that sense, this may have been a very good thing to happen. Now that I am calmer, and I have talked this through with others, I can see this quite clearly. I will survive. And I will continue on my program, ever-so-slowly carving away the pounds until I reach my goal.

I do wish the clinic had prepared me more fully for the possibility of large weigh-in swings. That might have helped here, and I am going to let them know that at my visit next week. I am also going to have a deeper conversation about my scale sensitivity and firm action I can undertake to stave off obsession with weigh-in numbers. I'm just not good at handling my stress associated with the scale. I admit this and I'm trying not to be ashamed of it. And I am not buying one. They need to know about that.

I forgot to remind everyone reading my blog that I have never been on a diet before, and this is part of the reason I was so rattled by this week's significant gain. I just assumed I would keep losing roughly 2.2 lbs. a week -- with occasional larger losses -- and have that minimal gain when I had my period. In other words, I had no idea this pattern could be broken, and maybe that always happens when someone is dieting. I had no clue. All I know is Optifast. I don't have experience with another weight-loss plan to use for a comparison. Well, at least I know now.

I want to wholeheartedly thank all of the wonderful people that have supported me these past few days. Your phone calls, emails, private messages and posts have helped me process this situation, learn from it, and grow from it. I've said it before and I'll say it again: I couldn't do this without you! And I mean that from the bottom of my heart. Big hugs to you -- always.    

My Brother "Weighs In"

After a terrible night's sleep, I awoke very early this morning almost in tears about my weigh-in yesterday. I felt like I was in an emotional downward spiral, and it scared me. I didn't want to wake my husband up because he has not been sleeping well lately. So I did the next best thing: I called my baby brother.

As you may recall, my brother did Optifast in the 1980s, when only the Optifast 70 plan was available. No soups, no bars, and he didn't use any flavoring for the shakes. I have no idea how he did it. Ever so wise is he when it comes to weight loss on Optifast. He also has a terrible metabolic rate like I do, and knows first-hand how that affects the individual's Optifast program. And there's another good thing about him: he's a practicing psychologist so when it comes to emotional issues regarding weight, he's got a very sharp mind to utilize to help me process my turmoil.

The very first thing he said to me was to stop posting my losses and gains on Facebook. Such behavior continues to reinforce in me that these numbers are paramount to everything else. As someone who is extremely sensitive to weight numbers (and even scales, for that matter), I must cease doing this immediately. There is also the "weight tracker" I used to have on this blog. I have now removed it. Unfortunately, it is not something that is good for me.

I do have the option of facing my back to the scale so I don't have to see any numbers at all. This was a practice I followed before I started Optifast. However, my brother was completely against this. He told me to face my fears head on -- don't avoid them and let them fester. Look at that number and take it for what it is: a snap-shot of a moment in time.

He also let me know that he was concerned about the 7.7 lb. weight loss last week, meaning he had a sneaking suspicion I would have a gain this week. That's just too significant a loss for someone with a thyroid disorder. And finally, he reinforced -- yet again -- what I need to know: I am in a marathon. I am not running a sprint. He is projecting I will be on Optifast into December. I shudder at that, and think about quitting, but I know I can't. I feel too healthy -- heck, I am healthy -- and I really like my program.

Now, I really want to emphasize that these are my issues and not yours! I know there is great pride and joy with every pound lost and you must celebrate this with friends and loved ones. Plus watching those pounds drop on the scale make you feel so good and motivate you more each time. Just know for me that I have to take precautions due to emotional issues. That's just the way it is.

I also need to let everyone know that regardless of what that number says on the scale, I am still continuing to shed inches like crazy. My body is burning fat at a nice clip. That has not stopped. There is a transformation going on in my appearance, regardless of what the scale says. So I'm trying to keep that in mind.

I want to take a moment to thank a very dear Optifast friend who is helping me through this crisis. I am so lucky to have made new friendships along my journey. A big hug to her. She has helped more than she will ever know.

There's Pain With That Gain

I've had three types of weigh-ins. The loss, the no-change, and the gain. Love the first kind, get frustrated with the second type, and I'm almost in tears with the third. It is with a very heavy heart that I must report I had a five pound gain this week. Yes, you read that correctly. I was shocked -- I have never had more than a .4 lb. gain since I started the program. I got on the scale three times to confirm this nightmare. No, it couldn't be! Sadly, it was all too true.

How am I feeling...well, numb actually. Still shocked. Grasping for reasons why this happened. There have been some recent changes to my program. My sodium level had measured 129 -- the normal number is 135 -- so the doctor told me to add 1/8 tsp. salt to my daily soup and to cut back my daily water intake to 56 oz. I was concerned about the water restriction, but my recent lab work shows my sodium level is now 132 so the new plan is working. It seems like a no-brainer that what I'm dealing with now is water retention. I am lugging around water weight and it's showing on the scale.

My wonderful dietitian assured me that I am continuing to lose fat and inches, regardless of the water weight. But while there is some relief in that, to see my 7.7 lb. loss last week almost wiped out by this week's gain has me feeling down-trodden and discouraged. My deep concern is that a possible obsession with the scale might take root. I am frightened of this. I do not want to live my life enslaved by numbers on a scale. It's unhealthy, it's dangerous, it's a deep pit of dispair. These numbers can trap me forever. I will not let that happen.

Another woman in the clinic, who was weighed before me, was outraged by her gain. She suggested the possibility that the scale was not calibrated correctly. I left the clinic before others were weighed, so I don't know if this trend continued with other program participants. This makes me want to purchase my own scale to compare results. But given my emotional issues with the scale, I do not have one right now and I don't think it's wise for me to purchase one yet. I must be careful. The dietitian will be coaching me on overcoming my scale fears. That's going to take some time.

So for now, I am doing what I always do: Maintain full compliance with my program and follow the doctor's instructions. I will say if I continue to have significant gains, I may have to rethink my decision to do Optifast. It's such a big financial investment and to not be seeing results is unacceptable. But let's just wait and see what next week's weigh-in brings. That's all I can do.